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WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump unveiled a bronze statue of Jeffrey Epstein in the Oval Office today, a gift from Attorney General Pam Bondi.
The statue, depicting Epstein in a seated position placed on the desk, serving as a nod to Pam’s infamous comment about having the "Jeffrey Epstein Files" on her desk—a statement she later clarified by asserting that the Jeffrey Epstein Files never existed.
“Elon’s out there tweeting like has the Files, but there are no files. What we have is a statue of a terrific guy. Lovely Guy. I met him many times. Partied with him, and he brought along his beautiful girls.. ehm.. I mean women.. same right?” boasted Trump in front of the statue.
The statue’s pedestal, engraved with “In Pam We Trust,” set forth as confirmation that Trump’s Attorney General Pam Bondi is the sole gatekeeper of Epstein’s secrets.
At publishing time, Pam Bondi said she can neither confirm or deny that Trump’s entire cabinet is in the Epstein Files.