Sponsorlytix Steps Up As Chelsea's Shirt Sponsor, Weaving Magic Metrics Into Every Thrilling Twist Of The Game

LONDON, UK — Chelsea Football Club has unveiled Sponsorlytix as their new front-of-shirt sponsor for the 2025-26 season and beyond.

The analytics firm has inked a deal worth £53 million per year – roughly the cost of one overpriced midfielder in today’s football market.

The partnership comes at a peculiarly opportune moment for the Blues, who find themselves perched third in the Premier League table after 11 games, just six points off leaders Arsenal and breathing down Manchester City’s necks like a particularly insistent VAR official.

“Sponsorlytix isn’t just a logo on a shirt; it’s the future of football, where every pass, tackle, and offside trap is quantified, optimised, and monetised,” said Chelsea chairman Todd Boehly. “We’ve always been about big data here at Chelsea – from scouting to calculating exactly how many managers we can cycle through in a season. This deal will help us weave those magic metrics into every thrilling twist of the game, ensuring our fans get not just goals, but memorable moments, and we get better sponsors such as Sponsorlytix.”

Enzo Maresca, the head coach, was equally excited. “In modern football, you have to go where your fans are, and they are on social media watching exciting moments. With Sponsorlytix, we can get closer to our fans,” he quipped during a press conference interrupted by yet another Fabrizio Romano ‘Here We Go’ alert.

“Sponsorlytix will also help us analyse why Moises Caicedo demands we sign his friend Joel Ordonez. It’s brilliant, really – finally, something to really help us win all the trophies this season.”

Omar Al Raisi, the owner of Sponsorlytix, couldn’t hide his delight. “Partnering with Chelsea is a dream,” Omar said. “They’re a club that’s all about winning. Imagine knowing precisely how much brand exposure you get from a Cole Palmer hat-trick. With AI, we can amplify every memorable moment of the game.”

The announcement has raised eyebrows across the EPL, where dodgy VAR decisions are as common as the English breakfast. But Sponsorlytix is different. Its precision is as magical as Maradona’s Hand of God.

At publishing time, Sponsorlytix’s preliminary metrics revealed Chelsea’s odds of clinching the Premier League at 68%, and if won, its brand value jumps by 200%.