New FBI Director Kash Patel Vows To Never Blink Incase Deep State Returns

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WASHINGTON D.C. — Kash Patel, newly appointed FBI Director, has pledged to ‘never blink’ incase the forces of the Deep State take over the federal government, after Trump destroys it.

Patel, after taking the oath at the Oval Office, took to the podium with a steely, wide-eyed stare that left reporters uncomfortable. “The Deep State doesn’t sleep, and neither will I blink,” Patel declared. “They could strike at any moment—during a briefing, a bathroom break, or even while I’m microwaving my leftover curry. Eyes Wide Open.”

Sources close to Patel say the director has already begun issuing orders to the 7000 employees to get on-the-road and catch bad guys, “he’s actually shutting the FBI building and turning it into a museum so the American People can see what a deep state conspiracy looks like,” said Charlie Kirk.

Meanwhile, rumors swirl that Patel has installed a network of mirrors in his office to watch his own back and has banned all FBI agents from using Visine, calling it a gateway drug to Deep State compliance.

At publishing time, Trump has stationed Patel outside the Oval Office to keep an eye on who gets in and out of his office, just incase a deep state intruder breaks in.