Islam Has Nothing To Do With Terrorist Attacks, Say Muslims, While Holding Quran And Declaring Jihad

A group of Muslims gathered at the local mosque to declare, with utmost sincerity, that Islam has absolutely no connection to the recent spate of terrorist attacks carried out by individuals claiming to act in the name of Islam. Holding copies of the Quran in one hand, and a gun in the other, these devout followers explained that the term "Islamic terrorism" is a misnomer, despite the attackers' frequent chants of "Allahu Akbar" before detonating their explosive vests at Christmas markets.