Investor Who Shorted The Last Crash Has Shorted The Next Crash Suddenly After Watching Alex Karp Doing Handstands
U.S. — Legendary investor Michael Burry has liquidated his entire portfolio and shorted Palantir after seeing Palantir CEO Alex Karp do handstand push-ups at the New York Times DealBook Summit.
Sources close to the Big Short star say the billionaire watched the video no fewer than 47 times before making the decision, “If that weirdo is doing handstands while his stock is up 400%, the entire system is beyond saving.”
“It finally broke him,” said a former Scion Capital colleague. “He predicted subprime, he predicted inflation, he even predicted GameStop. But Alex Karp defying gravity while preaching AI dominance? That was the black swan he never saw coming.”
Financial analysts were quick to weigh in. “This is classic Burry,” noted CNBC’s Jim Cramer. “He’s been warning about overvalued tech for years. One look at Karp upside-down and suddenly everything clicks—Palantir isn’t a company, it’s performance art funded by government contracts.”
Retail traders on Reddit’s WallStreetBets were less concerned. “Burry’s been wrong about the crash for like five years straight,” posted one user. “Meanwhile $PLTR is sending us to the moon. Let the vampire squid short—more tendies for us.”
At publishing time, sources confirmed Burry had deleted all social media, boarded up his windows, listening to hard rock music on loud speakers, and was last seen stocking canned goods while repeatedly whispering, “The handstand… it was too perfect… too perfect.”