Europe Restores Electricity Only For Mosques So Everyone Can Hear The Calls To Prayer

GERMANY — Following major grid failures that plunged entire Europe into blackouts, Europe has activated its backup electricity, only allocating it for mosques so everyone would be able to hear the muslim call to prayer over the loudspeakers.

“We know electricity is important to use for the computer, TikTok dance videos, cook food, and other essential everyday life tasks,” said EU President Ursula Gertrud von der Leyen. “Muslims being able to hear the call to prayer is really our priority as it can be dangerous, if you know what I mean.”

2.5 billion muslims from around the world rely on being daily prayers to maintain their peaceful selves, “if they are unable to do that, it will really disrupt their flow, and that’s when they can get distracted with things like JIHAD,” Ursula continued to explain.

German resident expressed relief after receiving this news, praising EU leaders for prioritising their safety.

At publishing time, European Leaders have confirmed that the next thing they will restore will be all the electricity required to resume 1200 pro-Hamas protests scheduled for this week across Europe.