China Offers Taiwan To Become The 23rd Province Of China

SPONSORED BY TECHNO MAGA

BEIJING, CH — Beijing has rolled out the red flag to invite Taiwan to become its 23rd province.

"Look, if Trump wants Canada, we can have Taiwan," explained China’s President, who probably shouldn't have said that on live TV. The proposal promises everything from free dim sum for life to a grand fireworks show every National Day.

The Taiwanese government responded by suggesting that perhaps China could become Taiwan's 2nd province instead. Social media is abuzz with Taiwanese citizens proposing alternative names like "Province of Taiwan" or "The Republic of Nvidia Chips."

Trump has suggested a series of joint "friendship" basketball games to ease tensions, while the EU proposed a cultural exchange where Taiwanese bubble tea meets Chinese baijiu. "Imagine the hangover," mused a diplomat, probably regretting his choice of words. Japan, not wanting to be left out of the fun, offered to mediate the talks but only if they could be held on a giant sushi boat.

Back in Taiwan, street artists have painted murals of Taiwanese President Tsai Ing-wen wearing a superhero cape. "We'll join China when pigs fly... and since we're pretty sure pigs can't fly, we're good," laughed a local artist at the parade.

At publishing time, Trump endorses Taiwan to join China.