Chimp Satire Chronicles Buys The Babylon Bee After It Has Nothing To Make Fun Of Anymore
BANANA REPUBLIC — After the announcement from The Babylon Bee walking away from making jokes because they have nothing to joke about with Trump becoming President, Chimp Satire Chronicles has acquired The Babylon Bee.
“It is with a heavy heart that I announce we have decided to close the doors here at The Babylon Bee,” said Kyle Mann in a statement from The Babylon Bee. “Satire requires targets worthy of mockery to persist. And unfortunately, with Donald Trump taking office this year, there will be nothing to make fun of.”
After being founded by Adnan Belushi, a satire comic who has published more than 1100 articles on X last year, Chimp Satire Chronicles will be acquiring Babylon Bee’s website, and continuing to write jokes.
“Babylon Bee did a great job poking fun at democrats, which put Trump on a pedestal equal to Jesus, and so, they just can’t get themselves to poke fun at Trump,” said Adnan Belushi, CEO of Chimp Satire Chronicles.
Babylon Bee agreed to a deal on the condition that Chimp Satire Chronicles will never make fun of Donald Trump. “We are delighted to sell The Babylon Bee to Chimp Satire Chronicles, but no writing jokes about Trump, he is our Jesus now. I will be setting up a network of churches around America, where we will worship Trump as Jesus, before we are christians,” said Babylon Bee owner Seth Dillon
The Editor-in-Chief at Chimp Satire Chronicle, Caesar from The Planet of the Apes, confirmed that christian jokes will also be retired. “More important than religion is evolution. Chimp, to humans, to robots. We will be joking more about that. After all, we are all chimps.”
At publishing time, Caesar also confirmed that they will also retire Babylon Bee’s obsession with The Lord of the Rings, and instead, will make fun of Planet of the Apes.