Celebrities Rush To Legalise Pedophilia Before The Release Of Epstein Client List

WASHINGTON, D.C. — After Attorney General Pam Bondi announced that the Epstein List is on her desk to review, high profile elites and celebrities made moves to legalise Pedophilia. before its release.

"Getting this pushed through the courts to have it legalised, will be tough" said actor and director Woody Allen, "but it's necessary in order to prevent the entire world from seeing us as terrible people. We are what holds Hollywood together, and without us pedos, forget about blockbuster movies.”