9 Political Beach Ball Games The New Zealand Government Will Distract You With
WELLINGTON, NZ — Time is ticking for the New Zealand government with no real results to show, and election campaign season is just a year away. Having crunched the numbers, the government is certain that they will not be able to score any major points before the next elections, so here are the 10 things, they have announced, that they will deploy, towards distracting you, to help them win the next election.
Previous government’s fault: It is all their fault. Give us 3 more years.
Public Servants: Blame the public servants running rogue and not listening to ministers. Give us 3 more years.
Trump: Trump’s tariffs are killing us but Winston will sort him out. Give us 3 more years.
Legacy media: We should not be giving media more money but we will only do that if they help us win. Give us 3 more years.
Treaty fights: Keep fighting and stay distracted on this one, the perfect beach ball game to play. Give us 3 more years.
Sending aid overseas: We will keep funding terrorists like UNRWA so you’re busy investigating us instead of critiquing our performance. Give us 3 more years!
Chasing more bad guys: We will catch a few more bad guys so you remain distracted from the bad things we do ourselves, like with children in our care. Give us 3 more years.
Globalist agenda: We will “rage farm” you by funding WHO and WEF so you don’t see the deficit we are building in our books. Give us 3 more years.
Climate Change: This is the ultimate tactic to ensure voters don’t too far left or right. Give us 3 more years
Enjoy the political beach balls, designed to entertain and distract you, so politicians organise themselves to win again, and public servants ensure the government remains in power.